A few weeks ago I took Aiden in to see my psychologist. Things have been so crazy this past year, and so much of what I am dealing with is the result of childhood trauma, that I wanted to kind of have a "mental health check-up" for him. Well, that and he has been asking to go for a long time. I have explained to him often how much my therapist helps me, and he thinks it is awesome. He wanted an appointment of his own. I thought that was darling. After his session, I sat down with the psychologist to get her thoughts. She said he was a very happy and loved little boy with an impressive emotional vocabulary. That last part made me giggle, because it is so true - having a mom in therapy for a year has an upside I guess. Then she hesitated slightly, and led with the phrase "I don't want to freak you out..." and my heart dropped into my stomach. She explained that she was concerned about his speech, and that she believes he is likely autistic. The autism part act
It has been a year (almost a year? I can't remember exactly) since I started the therapy that has completely changed my life. Throughout the course of this year, there have been times when I wanted to write about my experiences... but it never seemed like the right time. I still don't know how I could even begin to share my story while also guarding things that don't need to be shared. In some ways, finding a "safe" way to sterilize things enough to share them in the past was part of what was keeping me from really dealing with them. So where does that leave me as far as blogging goes? I am pretty sure this is the longest break I have taken from blogging since I started really loving it back when I was pregnant. Now, I have a little boy who will soon turn 8, and I feel like I am a completely different person sometimes. That is actually a big part of my current struggle with where I am at in this journey. There are times when I feel like I have woken up in someon